The toppings are also cursed...

So the Patriots are going to the Super Bowl. I'm still not sure how I feel about that.

My brother is a die-hard Pats fan (and was long before it was trendy to be one). That's good.

Now we'll have to deal with more whiny "no one respects us" crap from the lunatic fringe of Patriots fans. That's bad.

My brother isn't one of those people, and he's the only Pats fan I know personally. That's good.

One of the worst offenders happens to have a popular column on ESPN.com. That's bad.

The fact that the Patriots are back in the Super Bowl means that we'll probably get one of those Super Bowl week blogs from him, and they're usually entertaining. That's good.

Unless he spends the whole time whining about the Pats not getting enough respect. Which is probably what will happen. That's bad.

The entire city of Pittsburgh is on suicide watch right now. I hate Pittsburgh. That's good.

All the obnoxious Chowds who have been enjoying a little too much success in the world of sports recently seem poised to enjoy it again. That's bad.

The thought of having to listen to talking heads fight, scratch and claw for the right to slurp down Tom Brady and Bill Belichick's banjo gravy for two weeks is definitely unappealing. That's bad, too.

But in two weeks, it really won't matter. I can't root for Philly. That entire city sucks. I hate all of their teams, I hate their fans, and I hate the city itself. It's just a steaming pile. Any team from Philly could be playing a team from the old Soviet Union, and I'd be waving a pennant with CCCP on it. (In Soviet Russia, pennant wave you!)

So I guess go Pats, even if it means that we have to listen to their most annoying lunatic fringe bitching about the sporting equivalent of "they took out so many taxes from my winning Powerball ticket!"

Incidentally, I've always thought the Patriots should go back to their old school red uniforms, white helmets and the Pat Patriot logo. I liked that look back in the day, and a Steve Grogan retro jersey would be somewhat high on my wish list if I actually took the time to put together a wishlist of retro jerseys.


And no, I didn't just like it because the Patriot is bending over.