Tuesday, September 27, 2005


I think we all knew that something like this was going to pop up at some point.

Everyone is entitled to their opinion, but I think at some point, you need to recognize that Carr is never going to be fired. If you want him gone, your best hope is "gently guided to the thought of retirement by his friends in the athletic department." Even that is probably a few years away from happening.

Regardless, when you put a site like that together, you might want to at least know what you're talking about. For example, he lists Carr as 5-5 against OSU. Count 'em for yourself.
Wins: 1995, 1996, 1997, 1999, 2000, 2003
Losses: 1998, 2001, 2002, 2004

Now, I know I went to Ohio State and not the OMG Best Public University In The Universe!!11!!!, but that seems to at least suggest a 6-4 record against the Buckeyes. But I'm not sure because I had to go to my second hand to count the wins, and I may have lost track or something.

On a slightly different topic, I have now watched Les Miles coach two complete games in the last ten months or so. Please, please, please let him replace Carr at UM. I'm begging you. I'll pay to move him and his family up to Ann Arbor myself. Hell, I'll drive the moving truck. Let's make this happen.

Hmmm.... is www.hirelesmiles.com available?

Saturday, September 24, 2005

What a week

The highlight had to be watching OSU blow Drew Tate up (I forget which of the 57 times it was) and just losing my mind, climbing up on my coffee table and screaming "We're gonna fuck you up, Tate!" at the top of my lungs. Thank God my wife wasn't home at the time.

Nice to see Louisville going down like a drunken sorrority girl, too.

MSU is scary-good. That's going to be one hell of a game when they come to Columbus.

The Purdue-Minnesota and PSU-Northwestern games were both dandies. I was flipping back and forth between the ends of both of those and enjoyed both thoroughly.

I'm still formulating my thoughts on UM-UW.

USC could not have gotten more help in that game against Oregon. They got the benefit of at least two atrocious calls that I saw after flipping over from the end of the Michigan game, plus some stupid decisions by Oregon.

I decided today that I hate Notre Dame. I know the Domers all want to pretend it's because they're somehow relevent again. It's not. It's because their coach is a fat douchebag and I want to punch him in the face every time I see him.

I'll update my "teams that need to lose to get OSU into the Rose Bowl" list at some point, but I feel obligated to point out that it no longer applies equally to Michigan.

Friday, September 23, 2005

Getting good wood on the ball...

It's nice to see Raffy Palmeiro updating his resume.

Instead of just "Impotent lying cheater" he has now taken things up a notch.

He's now an "Impotent lying cheater who rats on his own teammates to try to save his own lying hide, but actually ends up lying about that, too."

What a douchebag. Hopefully he and Barry Bonds can get hit by the same bus.

Monday, September 19, 2005

Save a seat for me...

If you really think your team will make it to the Rose Bowl this year, you can now put your money where your mouth is.

The Tournament of Roses is letting you "bet" on your team by plunking down a certain amount of money now to guarantee yourself seats if they make it to the Rose Bowl. The better the team (more likely they'll make it), the more it'll cost you. For example, you'd need to put down almost $400 per pair of tickets for USC, but only $10 for Pittsburgh.

Here's the current cost for two tickets for Big Ten schools
Ohio State: $100
Purdue: $50
Wisconsin: $50
Iowa: $50
Michigan: $49
Michigan State: $10
Illinois: $10
Indiana: $10
Minnesota: $10
Penn State: $10
Northwestern: $10

Sunday, September 18, 2005

OSU offense explained...

The offense's struggles are not a strategic decision in the sense that the coaches sit down and say "how can we keep our offense from scoring too many points this week?"

It is strategy related because Tressel's offense is so risk-averse that it tends to stifle the explosiveness. That's not an intentional thing-- they don't WANT to stifle it, it just happens in this system.

An analogy: say you were driving from Columbus to New York.

Under Tressel's system, you'd go one mile per hour under the speed limit, just to make sure you got there safely. Sure, you wouldn't make good time, but you'd get there.

A lot of fans and posters on message boards point to USC and similar teams and ask why OSU can't go 110 mph like they do. Yes, they do it in a flashier manner, but if you're going that fast you're more likely to crash, and if you crash, you're dead. USC happens to have a very good driver right now (Leinert), so they can seemingly get away with their lead-footed ways.

If OSU turned Troy Smith totally loose like that, they'd hit a wall before they went 20 miles. No offense to Troy, but if you've watched the games, you've seen him hit opponents in the hands a bunch of times. So Tressel is minimizing the risk, puttering along in the right lane like your grandmother.

You can still crash there, but it's also not a bad way to make sure you complete the trip (see: 2002).

Are you threatening me?

(Somehow the Cornholio voice doesn't really come across through the written word.)

As I see it right now, there are a few dozen teams that still present a threat to the Buckeyes winning a spot in the Rose Bowl. (The threat presented by the OSU offense is an entirely different story) This also applies to teams like Michigan, Iowa, Tennessee, etc. who need to win out and get a little help to get to Pasadena.

You can break the threats down into four categories: Unbeaten BCS conference teams OSU doesn't play, unbeaten BCS conference teams that OSU does play, unbeaten non-BCS teams, and once-beaten BCS conference teams that could make an argument for a Rose Bowl slot if they win out.

There are a lot of teams on here that will make you go "no way" like Cincinnati (that impressive 7-3 win over Western Carolina aside, there's no way a once-beaten Cincy gets a Rose Bowl nod over OSU), but I'm trying to be thorough. Besides, assuming OSU wins, it'll be extremely satisfying to cross about half of these names off the list next week.

In no particular order...
Unbeaten BCS Conference Teams OSU doesn't play (27)
Florida State
Virginia Tech
Georgia Tech
Kansas State
Iowa State
Oklahoma State
Texas Tech
West Virginia
Washington State
Southern Cal

Unbeaten BCS Conference Teams OSU plays (4)
Michigan State
Penn State

Unbeaten Non-BCS Conference Teams (3)
New Mexico

Once-beaten BCS Conference Teams (23)
Boston College
NC State
Texas A&M
South Florida
Notre Dame
Oregon State
Arizona State
Mississippi State
Ole Miss

Saturday, September 17, 2005

Week 3 thoughts

I think I set a world record for football watching today. Thanks to Gameplan and having two TVs sitting next to each other (it's a sickness), I watched at least a substantial portion (more than half) of the following games: Michigan/EMU, Syracuse/Virginia, Ohio State/SDSU, Notre Dame/MSU, BC/FSU, Florida/Tennessee, UNC/Wisconsin, Vanderbilt/Ole Miss, USC/Arkansas.

I also caught at least a portion of: Pittsburgh/Nebraska, Clemson/Miami, Indiana/Kentucky, Oregon/Fresno State, UCLA/Oklahoma, and WVU/Maryland. That's a substantial portion of nine games, and 15 games total. I saw little snippets of other games (Iowa/Northern Iowa, Army/Baylor and a few others) but those don't really count.

Crazy stuff
- Urban Meyer goes for it on 4th-and-1 from his own 44, doesn't make it... and Tennessee can't capitalize (thanks to a correctly overturned call and a blocked field goal). Right then, you know UT was D-U-N.

- Phil Fulmer looks like a fat orange creamsicle in his shirt. That's not a good look on anyone.

- The "WTF?" scores of the night: Tulsa 54, North Texas 2 (in Denton). That one was actually 2-2 at one point. Patrick Cobbs went for 98 yards on 17 carries, but Jamario Thomas had only 13 yards on 7 carries. Does this somehow validate Laurence Maroney and Minnesota's performance against the Golden Hurricane a couple weeks ago? No, but it helps. The other one that I kept watching with morbid fascination finished: Cincinnati 7, Western Carolina 3. That must have been a doozy.

- An honorable mention "WTF?" score goes to San Diego State 6, OSU 0 with 14:49 left in the first. After netting 80 yards on their first play, and the Aztecs got 99 the rest of the afternoon.

- Buffalo finally scored. After 10 scoreless quarters, the Bulls kicked a field goal in the third quarter against Rutgers.

- Oregon's uniforms. I mean... my god. They look like something you'd see in an over-the-top football movie. But even then you'd say they were too garish to be real. They wore neon yellow pants with neon yellow jerseys with green sleeves and green helmets. I've seen them before, but didn't remember how hideous they were.

Spectacular Finishes
At one point late in the 3:30 games, I was flipping around between three classic finishes in-the-making. ND/MSU went to OT, Nebraska/Pitt was settled on a bizarre sequence involving a field goal try at the gun, and Clemson and Miami went to three OTs.

- Clemson should have won in regulation. The Tigers were down 3 with about 20 seconds to play and Charlie Whitehurst had a guy painfully open in the end zone. He overshot him and they had to settle for a tying FG by Jad Dean (second to Jim Bob Cooter in the "this guy must be from the south with that name" contest). Miami won in triple-OT.

- I know Michigan State's defense isn't good, but there's just no way you should let a guy like Brady Quinn go off for 487 yards and five touchdowns. He couldn't throw it 10 yards down the field last week against Michigan, and he's David Klingler this week? Come on. That being said, Drew Stanton is a scary, scary dude to see out there. I'm not looking forward to his visit to Columbus, even against that stout Buckeye D.

- How was it not intentional grounding on the Pitt kicker on the next-to-last play of that game? If you missed it, he caught a high snap on what was supposed to be a field goal try. He just heaved one straight down the field and it fell incomplete. He was not outside the tackle box and there were no Panthers downfield (or within 20 yards of where the pass fell). I was waiting for a flag that never came. It ended up being moot because his ensuing kick was blocked. 7-6? The Bill Callahan era has been a thriller in Lincoln, hasn't it?

Coverage and General Thoughts
- I normally love listening to Gary Thorne call a game (especially hockey). But he was absolutely terrible during the OSU/SDSU game. For one thing, he kept calling SDSU "San Diego"-- I think he got the name of the school correct about three times all game. That's fine, I figured out who he was talking about, but there is another school called "San Diego", that's completely separate from San Diego State. This drove me insane. He called the Buckeyes "Ohio" a couple times too. He was also 2-3 yards off on spots a lot, mispronounced guys' names all game and botched something else (an interpretation of a penalty or something-- I forget now) that had me screaming at my TV. I also could have done without the repeated references to Ryan Hamby's hate mail (either Thorne or the color guy said something about "the whole state of Ohio won't let him forget", when in reality Hamby got a handful of letters at the most), and his dismissing the crowd's cheers when Hamby caught a pass as being sarcastic. As I mentioned, I watched an awful lot of games, but Thorne was the only announcer that made me want to hit the mute button.

- The score ticker on CBS (during the Tennessee-Florida game) was a good 15 minutes behind the ticker on ESPN. I would see scores as final on ESPN, flip around a bit, end up on CBS and see the same game posted as having 5 minutes left. Is it that hard to keep those up to date? Really?

- Gameplan raped me again. In week one, I missed the first quarter and a half of the OSU game because they couldn't get the signal working. Today, the Buckeye game was blacked out on Gameplan because it was on the local ABC station. But when the local affiliate switched away from the game with five minutes to play, it was still blacked out on Gameplan. So I spent $100 to ensure that I wouldn't miss games and I've now missed parts of two. Douchebags.

- Maybe NBC can find a way to make their scoreboard at the bottom of the screen a little harder to read. Smaller font, maybe? Smoosh it down even lower on the screen? What the hell's wrong with putting it in the upper corner of the screen?

- Can we just agree on one common system for the 1st down line? Don't get me wrong, I love it-- frankly, it's the only TV sports development of the last 10 years that I give a crap about-- but it's a little disorienting when you flip back and forth between games.
ABC and ESPN don't identify the line of scrimmage and just use a yellow line at the first down mark.
CBS uses a blue line for the line of scrimmage and a yellow line for the first down.
TBS uses a red line for the line of scrimmage and a yellow line for the first down.
Jefferson Pilot doesn't identify the line of scrimmage and uses a purple line for the first down.
I'm pretty sure someone (ABC, maybe?) changes their first down line to red on fourth downs.
I don't really give a crap what color everyone makes it. Can we just make it consistent, please?

- I'm officially on the Vanderbilt bandwagon. I got totally sucked into their game with Ole Miss today, and am rooting hard for them to make a bowl game. They're 3-0 right now, and probably should be 5-0 in a couple weeks (home dates with Richmond and Middle Tennessee await). After that, they only need to win one of their last six games (LSU, Georgia, @ South Carolina, @ Florida, Kentucky, @ Tennessee) to make a bowl. If they can't win home games against Richmond, MTSU and Kentucky, they don't deserve to go bowling.

- Wisconsin is a pretty solid team all around. Good rushing game, good defense, pretty good special teams. But good lord... the thought of John Stocco throwing it with the game on the line must make Badger fans vomit up their cheese and brats and cheese. Singling out the quarterback is almost always oversimplifying things, but in this case I think it's fair. He's the only reason I don't think next week's game against Michigan is a "likely" win. (Translation: I'm not saying that I don't think they'll win.)

Friday, September 16, 2005

Jinxycat, Jinxycat where are you.

Yes, it is now official. I jinxed the Mets.

Ever since I made this post proclaiming my excitement over the fact that the Mets were only a half-game out of the wildcard, I think you can safely say that the wheels have come off the bandwagon.

Up until the time I wrote the post, the Mets were 69-62. Since then, they're 2-13. They're now a full seven games out of the wildcard, and would need to finish the year about 15-1 and get a bunch of help to sneak into the playoffs. Awesome.

At least they're co-champions of spring training. Woo.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

The highlight of the weekend.

I don't know how I possibly forgot this yesterday, but since I haven't seen it mentioned anywhere else, I thought I'd bring it up today.

As the announcers were going through the starting lineups before the Iowa-Iowa State game, they casually mentioned that one of ISU's starting defensive ends (I think)was "incarcerated" this time last year.

I just went through ISU's roster, and surprisingly, this fact is not mentioned in their media guide. If anyone knows who he is and what he was locked up for, this would be a good time to share.

Regardless, I guess he would be an expert in defending the jailbreak screen...

Monday, September 12, 2005

Thoughts on the weekend...

- Big Ten. Not so good. 7-3 is not a bad week, unless it's your three top teams all losing. Maybe not as strong as we thought.

- Florida State: If you're only up 13-10 on the Citadel at the half, it doesn't matter how many points you score in the third and fourth quarter. It's still a crappy performance.

- Judging by the performance of every non-Texas Big XII team over the last couple weeks, the Horns might not be challenged for the rest of the year. Oklahoma is more one-dimensional right now than Seann William Scott. Nebraska looked good, but it was against a team who lost to Vanderbilt, so take that for whatever it's worth. Missouri lost at home to New Mexico and Kansas State needed Marshall to make an absolutely retarded play to escape with a win. Yes, ISU beat up on Iowa, but I would have loved to see four quarters worth of Drew Tate before we dub that a huge win.

- The Big East went 5-2, which is impressive until you realize that four of the wins were over D-1AA teams and the other one was against Buffalo. At this rate, Dave Wannstadt might resign before October.

- I hate the idea of playing conference games so early in the year (as some teams from the ACC, SEC and Pac-10 did this weekend and Miami and FSU did last week). Considering how much more they mean to everyone except national title contenders, wouldn't you want both teams in peak form before you kicked those off? I remember Michigan and Illinois opening their seasons against each other in the mid-90s, and hated it then, too. I know, you've got to be ready whenever, but I think you would want at least two games under your belt before playing a league game.

- I'm still not ready to talk about the OSU game. The what-ifs are enough to drive you insane (the almost-safety on the kickoff, the Texas field goal that banked in off the upright, the stupid late hit penalty on Chad Hoobler that set that kick up, Ryan Hamby catching/ dropping/ catching/ dropping/ catching/ dropping one pass in the end zone, the *this close* kick returns by Santonio Holmes and Ted Ginn that were almost six, Justin Zwick playing the last drive, Justin Zwick not sliding and instead fumbling on the last drive... the list goes on and on). OSU should have won that game, but based on the way they played, they didn't deserve to. Texas did. (If that makes sense)

One more thing. I should preface this by saying that I was at the OSU game and walked all around the campus before the game, and did not see anything remotely hostile directed at any Texas fans. There was a group of Texas fans in my section and they all talked about what a great time they had in Columbus, before and during the game. We had a nice conversation, shook hands after the game and I (and others) congratulated them on their win. That's not to say that nothing happened to anyone this weekend, but I didn't see it.

A related story: Back in 1997, I was at the OSU-Michigan game in Ann Arbor and was pushed, cursed at and had a beer dumped on me in the stands after the game ended. Guess what? There are assholes everywhere. That does not mean that every Michigan fan is an asshole. It means that some drunk was an asshole.

Today, Michigan fans on one board are ripping OSU fans because of stories about this weekend (Texas fans getting sworn at, etc). The UM fans say it's BS to blame it on a few bad apples.

The subject of the bottle-throwing at the UM-ND game came up shortly afterward. Michigan fans apparently have no problem saying, "It's okay, it was only a few bad (student) apples."


Frankly, I think the whole bottle-throwing incident is just begging for UM to put together a PSA to air on the scoreboard.

It starts with a shot of the back of a player in a Michigan uniform. He's screaming at fans about their stupid and childish bottle-throwing and asking where they got the idea.

Then the camera could pull out to show the students crying and angrily screaming, "I learned it by watching you, Marlin Jackson!"

Then show Jackson with a stunned look on his face and close with some serious-sounding warning about how football players who hit people in the head with bottles will have fans who try to hit people in the head with bottles.

Just trying to help.

Sunday, September 11, 2005

Just asking...

At what point does Lloyd Carr become a "bad big-game coach?"

His three biggest regular season rivals are Ohio State, Notre Dame and Michigan State (probably in that order).

Since the start of last season...

1) Michigan was a 12-point favorite at Notre Dame and lost 28-20 (in a game that wasn't really as close as the score indicates)

2) Michigan was an 11-point favorite at home against Michigan State and trailed 27-10 in the fourth quarter. They managed to pull it out in overtime thanks only to a one-man circus of improbability by Braylon Edwards, coupled with Drew Stanton turning into a china doll again.

3) Michigan was a 5-point favorite on the road against a 6-4 Ohio State team and got its ass handed to it, 37-21. Needed an Iowa win over Wisconsin to back into the Rose Bowl.

4) Michigan was a 7-point favorite at home against Notre Dame and imploded. Yes, there were injuries, but Steve Breaston is apparently in the witness protection program (at least on pass plays) and Kevin Grady has come down with a case of the fumblies. The defense still gave up 17 points against a team whose quarterback couldn't throw a downfield pass all day, and who buttoned it up to a ridiculous degree in the second half.

That's barely 1-for-4 in big rivalry games, when they probably should be 4-0. And Carr is now 1-3 against each of his two biggest rivals in their last four meetings.

A trip to East Lansing and a visit from the Buckeyes still await...


I got home from the OSU-Texas game around 4 am. I'll probably have something more substantive later, but a few quick thoughts...

- Ryan Hamby. Catch. The. Fucking. Ball. That play made baby Jesus cry.
- For the 1 millionth time in a row, we have now reaffirmed that you can't settle for field goal after field goal against a good team.
- Vince Young played about 10 good minutes in that game. They happened to be the first seven and the last three. The rest of the time, OSU had him running for his life. But he got it done when he needed to.
- If you have a three-plus hour drive home, you have a lot of time to go over "what ifs." That will be a loss that haunts this team, because they should have won. Frankly, they could (and maybe should) have been up by three touchdowns early in the third quarter.
- Give Texas credit, they came into a very difficult place to win and did it.
- Man, I miss college.
- I guess the only good news is that OSU didn't shit down its leg as thoroughly as Michigan did. The Big Ten title (and possibly a shot at the Rose Bowl) are still well within grasp.

More later.

Saturday, September 10, 2005

The new phone books are here!

Like Navin R. Johnson, I've been waiting for this day for quite a while.

What a day-- sunny, not a cloud in the sky, and just a hint of fall in the air.

What a game-- #2 and #4 in the country, two of the winningest programs in college football history (Texas 786 wins, Ohio State 765) meeting for the first time ever in more than a century of play, and what promises to be one of, if not the loudest crowd in Ohio Stadium history.

Keys to the game
1) Control the line of scrimmage: If OSU's d-line can hold their own against an oversized line from Texas, the Bucks can probably control the Horns' running game. If they can do that, they've got a shot. The same is true on the other side of the ball. If the O-line can open some holes (and hopefully protect the QB), it could be an incredible night.

2) Shuffle the QBs correctly: I don't care who starts (although I would be surprised if it's not Justin Zwick) and I don't really care who plays how many series. I just hope to God that Tressel isn't coming in saying "we need to play Troy Smith in the first quarter", and then yanks Zwick while he's hot. Believe me, it has happened. If Zwick moves the ball all night, let Smith sit on the bench. If Smith moves the ball all night, let Zwick sit on the bench.

3) Turnovers: I don't think Vince Young is going to be a big factor with his legs tonight-- just a gut feeling. Assuming OSU controls the rest of the Texas run game, that means they have to beat the Buckeyes through the air. I don't think they can do that without help. If the turnovers finish even, I think OSU wins. If the Bucks are +2, they might win by double digits. If they finish -2, it could be a long, sad drive home tonight.

4) Playmakers: Ted Ginn vs. Ramonce Taylor. One of these guys is going to make a "holy crap, did you see that?" play tonight. If it's Ginn, I don't see Texas winning.

5) The Pittman/Holmes/Gonzalez group: With Texas working OT to contain Ginn, one of these guys needs to make something happen tonight as well. If you leave Holmes and Gonzalez in single coverage all night, I think one of them scores. Pittman needs to average 4 yards a pop tonight and not put it on the ground.

6) Texas' stable of running backs: They're big, they're fast, they're deep. If Texas takes an early lead, they might be able to grind on the Buckeyes all night. That's why you can't let Texas take an early lead.

7) Special teams, special teams, special teams: A trademark of the Tressel era. Texas' kicker is a little shaky (three missed/blocked PATs in week one) and OSU's kicker is for all intents and purposes a first-year starter. Let's see if these guys can nail a clutch kick. It could very easily come down to that.

My best guess: Ohio State 23, Texas 17.

Halloween comes early...

Ohio U just beat Pitt on national TV. Needless to say, the misses (an OU grad) is more than a little excited.

I think it's safe to say that the Big East officially ranks somewhere below "steaming pile" this year.

Only 19 hours and 14 minutes 'til kickoff!

Thursday, September 08, 2005

The neverending week

At this point, I'm pretty much convinced that Saturday will never, ever get here.

This has easily been the longest week I can remember since the leadup to the 2003 Fiesta Bowl. I lost all ability to focus on non-football stuff around Monday afternoon, and have spent easily six hours since then searching the internet for a ticket.

At this point, it looks like I'll be going down there without oneI just bought a crappy seat, but it's inside the stadium. I'm hoping to trade up once I get there.

It also occurred to me that you could easily go to the Michigan-Notre Dame game, leave after three quarters or so, and make it to Columbus in time for the kickoff. That would be one hell of a day (provided, of course, that you had $500 to shell out for something like that and were okay didn't have a problem with leaving a game that early). I don't. And I do.

Only 53 hours and 32 minutes to go...

Monday, September 05, 2005

Southern Speed on Southern Comfort

I don't think I even need to wait for the game to end before declaring the Florida State-Miami game a steaming pile of crap.

What the hell happened to football in that state?

Incidentally, it's probably safe to say that this guy's replica jersey isn't a big seller in the campus bookstore.


I was just poking around a bunch of football blogs, since A) I'm at work and B) I'm about ready to explode if Saturday doesn't get here.

I stumbled on The Sunday Morning Quarterback and while it seems like a really interesting site, written by intelligent fans (I mean, they did pick the Buckeyes to win the Big Ten), the last post is a little haunting.

Thoughts on Saturday (#2) and beyond

A couple more things from the late games Saturday and the Sunday affairs.

- Dennis Franchione: Awesome job of game management. You score a touchdown to go up one with about 10:00 to play in the game. The opponent has scored exactly one touchdown against you all night, but has kicked five field goals.
Do you: A) Go for two, giving yourself the comfort of knowing that if you make it, they need a touchdown or multiple field goals to beat you.
B) Kick the PAT, giving yourself a two-point lead, protecting a tie in the unlikely event of a safety, and yet leaving you vulnerable to something the other team has been doing all night (kicking field goals).
C) Act surprised!
D) All of the above.
Dennis picked "B" and Dennis picked wrong. This guy is getting paid a kajillion dollars to manage the game, and he can't even handle a simple decision like this. I know this seems like a second guess, but I was going ballistic when it happened, too. I hate stupid people.

- Reggie McNeal's parents: The sideline reporter from the Texas A&M-Clemson game (the blonde with the 1987 bangs) went into the stands to interview McNeal's parents in the third quarter. She asked if they were worried about the interception their son threw, and the passes his receivers were dropping. His dad said (I'm paraphrasing) I'm not worried about the interception. They can overcome that. But the other guys need to pick it up; receivers and the defense need to do more.
Oooookay. It's not your son's fault. It's everyone else's. I didn't realize college football players had "stage moms." I bet if other parents on the team saw that it will really help team unity.

- Big East: Awesome weekend. We already knew you suck, but damn.
Cincinnati beats Eastern Michigan by 2 at home.
Rutgers blows a 27-10 lead in the fourth quarter and loses to Illinois.
Pittsburgh takes one up the ass from Notre Dame at home.
South Florida gets spanked by Penn State
Your supposed champion-in-waiting, Louisville, barely beats one of the worst BCS conference teams in the country (Kentucky).
West Virginia and Syracuse basically crap all over the field against each other for 60 minutes.
The marquee win is Connecticut beating Buffalo, 38-0.

- This is going to be one of the longest weeks of my life. Outside of Michigan games, I don't think I can remember being as excited for a game as I am for the Texas game this weekend. I don't have tickets, but am planning on driving down anyway and hoping for the best. I'm going to be seriously, seriously pissed if I can't get in.

Sunday, September 04, 2005

Sad news from Suspender-land

Adrian Karsten died.

I always liked his sideline reports-- he usually had something much more insightful to say than the bimbos they've got down there now.

It also sounds like his life was a real mess. Too bad.

Suspenders not pictured.

Saturday, September 03, 2005

Thoughts on Saturday #1

The late games aren't over, but my eyeballs are bleeding from 11.5 straight hours of football, so I'm pretty much foregoing the end of the UCLA-SDSU game.

A few brief thoughts (with further explanation as merited at a later time and date).

- Big Ten: 10-0. Sweet.

- MAC: 1-10. Great win over Western Illinois, though.

- Big XII: Biggest Flop of the day. Oklahoma loses, Texas A&M loses, Baylor barely beats SMU, Oklahoma State barely beats D-1AA Montana State, Kansas State squeeks one out against barely-D1A Florida International, Iowa State struggles against D-1AA Illinois State, Kansas wins ugly against barely-D1A Florida Atlantic, Nebraska wins a nailbiter against Maine(!?!?). The "marquee win" was Colorado at home over Colorado State on a field goal at the gun. Other than that, it was Missouri over Arkansas State and Texas mauling Louisiana-Lafayette. I mean... three ugly wins against D-1AA schools, two more ugly ones against teams that are playing their first season as D-1A schools, and two of your top three teams lose to unranked opponents? Good God.

- Ohio State: Surprisingly easy win, at least from what I saw. Ginn needs to stop trying to score on every play. Sometimes a first down is okay.

- ESPN Gameplan: Great fucking job finally getting the OSU-Miami game up on the satelite sometime in the middle of the second quarter. More on this later. Eleven hours later, I'm still pissed. Assholes.

- Michigan: Yeah... umm... good effort, guys. How many of these games are now back in the "possible loss" column: Notre Dame, Wisconsin, Michigan State, Minnesota, Iowa, Northwestern, Ohio State? That was embarassing today for long, long stretches. You'd better beat that lard-ass Weis next week. I don't want to listen to the season-long suckfest that will follow if ND goes to 2-0.

- Michigan, Part 2: Your offense is scary-good. Avant: He catches football-shaped objects well. The game with MSU could end up with the loser scoring 38-42 points. And I know the blocked PAT wasn't Rivas' fault, but the atrocious miss from 48 yards was. Rest assured, I'm keeping track.

- Texas: The win was meaningless, but having your new kicker miss one PAT and get two others blocked is not a good sign for close games.

- Bowling Green: Offense- really good. Defense- Too bad they couldn't make it. Madison is fun.

- Notre Dame: Let's see that fancy shit next week. Pittsburgh sucks. However, I'm suddenly not sold on the fact that Michigan walks away an easy winner next week. That's going to be an interest point spread to see.

- Pittsburgh: Your defense sucks. A lot.

- Tennessee: Nice showing against UAB. Good freaking luck against Florida and LSU.

- Southern Cal: Your defense looks vulnerable. Really, really vulnerable. At least from what I saw during the first half.

- Boise State: Thanks for playing. Coupled with the MAC, this weekend has been a bloodbath for the non-BCS schools.

- College Gameday: WTF is with the country music in the open? Last year's was great. This year's blows. Nick Lachey? Desmond Howard? Fuck that noise. Give me Kirk, Lee and Chris, give me the old theme song and give me some decent analysis. Enough with the bullshit already.

Friday, September 02, 2005

Game on.

I spent the better part of last night glued to my sofa, flipping back and forth between the Spurrier suck-fest on ESPN and the Houston/Oregon game on the dookie. Then, I watched Laurence Moroney run for 160 yards on like 8 carries and went to bed.

Good first night.

I'm already having trouble concentrating on work today. We're T-minus 26.5 hours to kickoff, I've officially got my ESPN Gameplan ordered, and it's pretty much on.

I've been crazy busy this week (ass-tastic night on the sofa aside), between work, the other work, and the company I'm trying to start (that's three jobs if you're scoring at home, accounting for about 40, 20, and 20 hours per week, on top of my "taking care of my house", and "doing just enough stuff with my wife that she doesn't leave me at least until the end of college football season because she makes awesome game-watching food.") so my posting has been a lot less regular than I had hoped.

I still owe Brian a response, and really should put together some kind of prediction something about the OSU game. One, both, or neither coming later today. Depending on work, and whether I just end up running through a wall at some point.

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